Coming face-to-face with your inadequacies can be painful, to say the least. It challenges the way that you believe people see you and even makes you question yourself. Your knee-jerk reaction may be to get defensive or even dismiss the critique entirely. But handling negative feedback with grace and decorum will not only make you look gracious, but it could ultimately help you grow as a person. Here’s how to do it.
面對不足之處是痛苦的,至少可以這樣說。它讓你質(zhì)疑人們看待你的方式,甚至讓你質(zhì)疑自己。你也許會(huì)本能地開啟防守,甚至進(jìn)行駁回。但是,得體地處理負(fù)面信息不僅會(huì)讓你更優(yōu)雅,而且最終會(huì)幫助你成長。以下是方法。
1.Be objective about the criticism
1.客觀對待批評
Before you jump to conclusions and begin to challenge the other person’s opinion, take a step back and look at it objectively.
在你下結(jié)論并開始質(zhì)疑別人的意見之前,先退后一步,客觀地看待它。
Next time you get a bad review, don’t immediately allow your emotions to get the better of you, but rather, take a moment to consider whether the criticism is at all accurate. Give yourself a chance to really take in the information and evaluate it.
下次你遇到負(fù)面評價(jià)時(shí),不要立即讓情緒主導(dǎo)自己,而是花點(diǎn)時(shí)間來思考批評是否屬實(shí) 。給自己一個(gè)機(jī)會(huì)去接受和評估它。
2.Avoid unnecessary confrontation
2.避免不必要的沖突
If you decide that the point is valid, it may be hard to take. In your discomfort, you may feel the urge to lash out at the other person and defend yourself. But it’s best to avoid getting into an argument.
如果你認(rèn)定自己的觀點(diǎn)是正確的,那它可能很難讓人接受。你不爽,你也許想立即反擊別人保護(hù)自己。不過,最好是避免爭吵。
3.Be open to the idea of change
3.接受改變
Most of us are pretty stubborn. And it may be because of a concept called “cognitive dissonance” that can prevent us from changing even when that’s what we need most.
我們大多數(shù)人都很頑固。這可能是因?yàn)?ldquo;認(rèn)知失調(diào)”,它可以防止我們改變,即使我們最需要改變。
4.Ask questions
4.提問
If you’re open to using the criticism as a springboard to improvement, you will likely need more information. The initial moment you hear the criticism may not be the best time to ask for more details. Your emotions will be riding high, and you may not be particularly receptive to extra information. However, when you feel ready, it could be worth revisiting the subject with the person who criticized you. Even if you don’t agree with their advice, thank them and promise to consider it.
如果你愿意把批評作為改進(jìn)的跳板,你可能需要更多信息。最開始聽到批評的時(shí)候可能不是尋求更多細(xì)節(jié)的最佳時(shí)機(jī)。因?yàn)槟菚r(shí)你情緒高昂,可能不會(huì)特意去接受額外的信息。反而,當(dāng)你覺得準(zhǔn)備好了,就可以和當(dāng)事人一起重新審視這個(gè)問題了。即使你不認(rèn)同他們的建議,也要感謝他們并答應(yīng)考慮考慮。